Wednesday, March 08, 2006

When is it okay to drink before 10 am?

ESPN's the sports guy came up with a modified list in response to a reader pointing out some omissions. I was trying to think if he left any other situations out. For me it would be St. Patrick's Day when conditions are appropriate. Say, for example, when you are in Cancun for your first and only Spring break as a college senior while there is a blizzard going on back in New England. Although that might just fall under the envelope of Spring Break rule of being able to drink 24/7 although we did generally wait until noon that being the time when we usally woke up on the beach quite thirsty and in need of more sunscreen. I will try to dig up some pictures. I need a scanner.
Here is his list.

SG: You're right, I completely blew that list the first time around; I'm taking a mulligan. Here's my official "When it's OK to drink before 10 a.m." list:

While attending football tailgates, college reunions or the Boston Marathon … during your final two weeks of college … during any Vegas trip or bachelor party or guys-only golf outing … if you pulled an all-nighter and haven't left a strip club yet … before any wedding that starts at 1 p.m. or earlier … any time your in-laws are visiting … during any morning when it's below 10 degrees … if you're dating an actress and just attended a movie premiere during which she had a graphic sex scene with someone else on a 50-foot screen … while living in any town in Canada that's farther than 75 miles from Toronto, Montreal, Ottawa or Vancouver … if you've been writing for a late-night talk show for more than two years … if your name is "Jack Nicholson" … before your fantasy football draft if you're trying to get the ball rolling so some of your other buddies get plastered … and if you're Vin Baker and you're getting checks from four different NBA teams at the exact same time.


dolittle said...


The one p.m. wedding a good one! I remember an afternoon wedding of a
co-worker where we all decided to get together for brunch beforehand. Mimosas flowed and we were feeling it before the reception even began. We partied at my place post-hitching.
Good times!


displacedriverrat said...

where is Easter???

Dexter said...

Vested interest in the end of Lent, eh?

El Duderino said...

Hair of the dog. In the AF I used to mix alkaseltzer in gatorade with a frozen shot of Absolut. If you could keep it down you could almost function.

scruffylooking said...

I've never been the biggest drinker, but I did have a great drinking before 10 am moment. When I was saving salmon in N Cali., a bunch of us went tubing/drinking down the Eel River. What I remember of it was great. I still have no idea how we got home.

zaphod said...

If you work the third shift, drinking before 10 AM is flat out normal. I do it all the time but most of my alcohol comsumption occurs with a meal. The only consideration I have is not the time of day; it's what I'm eating. A beer and reheated pizza is a natural combo. Beer and eggs just do not go together.

Dexter said...

I forgot about the shift workers. When I used to bartend at Memory's here in town the third shift would come in around 6am and start pounding shots. Our proximity to the two adult book film and book stores led to some interesting purchases by tipsy customers.